Found and Lost Lost and Found
by Akai Mu Tsuki
Summary: I found you in the snow on Christmas Eve... and lost you exactly ten years later. So why, five years after that horrible day, are you standing before me? Can be interpreted as shounen-ai between the two pillars, but it wasn't really intended...read please


_**I found you in the snow on Christmas Eve… and lost you exactly ten years later. So why, five years after that horrible day, are you standing before me?**_

_**EDITED: September 11, 2010**_

_The white snow swirled around in a blizzard, trapping the young child within. A bespectacled youth ran into the swirling wind and reached his hand out to the younger male. "Wake up!" the brunette shouted in a childish voice as he gathered the small child in his arms. He ran toward two bright lights and yelped when he slid on some ice, causing him to fall harshly onto the floor._

_The bespectacled brunette growled and trudged up the steps, his energy flickering on and off. He opened the white door to his house and laid the hypothermic child on a red, velvety couch. The bespectacled youth draped a blanket over the small child's frame and looked at the boy with sympathy._

"Tezuka! Are you awake?" a voice called out and the aforementioned brunette opened his tired hazel eyes to look at his most trusted friend.

"I'm fine, Oishi. I just feel a bit tired, that's all. I… had a nightmare," Tezuka murmured in slow and short sentences.

"Oh, what kind of nightmare was it this time?" the black haired teen asked worriedly.

Tezuka simply looked at his pale hands in depression before speaking, "I found someone… in a blizzard."

"That's not a nightmare, that's you being a hero," Oishi corrected, apprehensive for what Tezuka was about to say next.

"…But I lost him. Oishi… did I ever tell you about a child I found in the snow exactly fifteen years ago?"

"No," the teen denied while shaking his head.

"Well… I was snowboarding in the mountains on Christmas Eve when I found him. He was in a pretty bad shape, and I was pretty sure he had hypothermia. My parents were sleeping so I brought him into my house…"

_Tezuka stirred the small spoon to dissolve the brown powder into the hot water. He jumped off of the stool and brought the two cups over to the couch, holding out one of them to the now conscious child. "Here. It's hot chocolate, it'll warm you up if you drink it."_

_The black haired child took the mug and wrapped his small hands around the large object as if it were his lifeline. He dipped his head down in probably embarrassment. "…Thank you," he mumbled softly and Tezuka blinked before sitting down on the same red couch._

"_It's fine, no harm done. It's pretty boring up in the mountains anyway. It was… kind of exciting to have something to do for a change."_

"…" _the child was silent and Tezuka sipped his hot chocolate, careful not to burn his tongue._

_The young boy across from the hazel-eyed one tipped the cup and stuck his tongue out, scrunching up his face when he tipped it back down. "…It hurts."_

_Tezuka smiled. "You burned your tongue. Sometimes, when you drink hot things or eat hot things, you can burn your tongue like that. I'll get some cold water to make it feel better."_

_The golden-eyed child nodded compliantly and Tezuka, as he said he would, walked into the kitchen to pour a cup of cold water. The child on the couch stared into the fireplace and snuggled deeper into his covers. The child was asleep by the time Tezuka came back with the water._

"_Hey, watch out!" Tezuka dropped the ceramic mug and dashed forward to catch the steaming cup of hot chocolate. "Geez, don't do something dangerous like that!"_

"…_Mnn… mom… dad…" the child whimpered and his eyebrows creased in discomfort._

_Tezuka placed the almost full cup of hot chocolate down and blinked. "…Is he talking in his sleep?"_

"_No… mom…! Dad…!" the child turned around on the couch and the blanket drifted to the floor._

"_Hey, wake up!" called worriedly and grabbed the child's arm._

"_Let go of me!"_

_Golden eyes suddenly opened and Tezuka's hazel eyes stared into them. "…I…I'm sorry…" the child looked away quickly and bit his lower lip. "I was having a bad dream."_

_Tezuka released his grip on the young child and sat down beside him. "It's okay. Everyone has bad dreams at times, you know?" Tezuka smiled at Ryoma sympathetically, as if trying to comfort the boy. "They're called nightmares."_

"…_I see."_

"_What's your name?"_

_The golden-eyed boy curled into a ball and stared into the dancing fire. "…I don't have one."_

"_What?" Tezuka looked at the child in shock. "What do you mean you don't have one?"_

_The child shrugged. "I don't know my name."_

_The bespectacled child pushed his glasses up. "Do… Do you have amnesia?"_

"…_I don't know. I only remember distant memories… fragments of my past that seem to never repair. The pieces won't ever fix itself," the child whispered solemnly and narrowed his eyes in his depressed state._

"…_I'm sorry," Tezuka apologized while touching his pale hand lightly to the child's shoulder._

"…_It's fine. What's your name?"_

"_Tezuka Kunimitsu," the brunette said with practiced ease._

"…_Tezuka… will you give me a name?" the child asked, turning to the brunette hopefully. Tezuka smiled again and his hazel eyes shined with happiness._

"_Sure."_

"What did you name him?" Oishi asked curiously.

"I named him Ryoma," Tezuka told his friend.

"So… how did you lose him?"

Tezuka's hazel eyes suddenly grew even gloomier. "…Ten years later… we were at a new house. I waited with my parents to throw a surprise birthday party for him… but he never walked through the door."

_The three Tezukas stared at each other in confusion. "Where is he? Kunimitsu even came home from his college just to celebrate his birthday with him," Ayana, Tezuka's mother, worried while biting her lip. "Kuniharu, do you know where Ryoma is?" Tezuka's father shook his head. "Kunimitsu? Did he tell you if he was celebrating with his friends?"_

"_No, he said he was just going to go home," the bespectacled college student said with a troubled expression on his face._

"_I'm going to call the school," Ayana decided and picked up the phone, only to have it ring. "Hello?" she asked._

"_**Hello, is this the Tezuka residence?**__" a voice asked and Ayana confirmed the question with a firm 'yes.'_

"_**Umm… well… we're calling to ask you to come to the school, please. It involves… your adoptive son,**__" the school principal said nervously and Ayana widened her eyes._

"_What's wrong? What happened to Ryoma?" Kuniharu rubbed his wife's back comfortingly to soothe her rising panic._

"_**It… isn't exactly something that should be discussed by means of the telephone. Please come to the school immediately.**__"_

_The phone beeped and Ayana quivered in apprehension. "…Kuniharu, take Kunimitsu and go to the school. I… I'm going to get some rest…" she stumbled up the stairs and the two male Tezukas heard a door close softly._

_Tezuka turned to his father with worry in his eyes. "What happened to Ryoma, dad?"_

"_I… don't know. But that's what we're going to find out," Kuniharu said as he shrugged his jacket on, taking the keys as he left the house. Tezuka could only silently follow after his father, assuming the worst thing that could happen to his best friend and adopted little brother._

_He wasn't expecting the news he was about to hear… and _see.

_The principal cleared his throat and pulled out a letter. "This… was addressed to Tezuka Kunimitsu. I'm assuming that would be you…?" Kuniharu shook his head and turned to his bespectacled son, who took the letter and turned it around in his hands. His hazel eyes widened as he read each line._

**Dear Tezuka Kunimitsu,**

**-I suppose you are wondering where your precious little brother is right now, right? Well, you don't have to worry any longer. I'll tell you where he is: not in this world anymore. Your little brother is **_**dead**_**. Hear me? D-E-A-D… DEAD. I killed him and, if you're wondering why… I might as well tell you. He was **_**annoying**_** and **_**bratty**_**. He couldn't do anything himself… and he was **_**always**_** clinging to you. Heh, I guess you could say I did it out of jealousy. But you'll never find your brother's murderer. If you received this letter, it means **_**I'm**_** dead, too. Well, have fun living the rest of your life knowing you couldn't save your little brother, **_**Tezuka.**_

**Sincerely, Fuji Syuusuke**

_Tezuka looked at the typed letter in shock. "N-No… this can't… Ryoma can't be dead!" he shouted and threw the paper on the floor, tears threatening to flow down his cheeks._

"_We do not know whether or not the younger Tezuka is dead… but we have knowledge that Fuji Syuusuke is," the principal paused. "There were burn marks all over his body, but… the body was still recognizable."_

"_Good! He deserves to die!" Tezuka growled in outrage. "For pulling such a prank like this…" he grit his teeth, salty tears falling from his hazel eyes. He knew what he was saying wasn't the truth._

_He knew Ryoma was dead. He just _knew _it._

_Kuniharu hugged his sobbing son and Tezuka could only cry into his father's shoulder. "Why… why?" Tezuka asked no one in particular… getting no answer in return. The brunette couldn't take it anymore. He didn't even try to stop the loud mourning cries coming from his mouth and the sad tears falling from his eyes._

Oishi stared at Tezuka in shock. "I… I never knew you had such a sad past, Tezuka. No wonder you try to avoid making close friendships with people… I'm so sorry for your loss."

Tezuka grit his teeth. "It's been five years since that day… today is his birthday."

Oishi's eyes saddened and he stood from the chair he was sitting on. "Are you going to visit his grave?"

"…Yes," Tezuka whispered while he closed his eyes. "I've gone to that tombstone… everyday for the past five years."

"So that's where you disappear to?" Oishi asked while blinking his eyes curiously.

"Yeah," Tezuka replied shortly and he looked out his window. The crisp, white snowflakes slowly tumbled to the ground, piling up upon each other. Tezuka gave a short ironic laugh.

"The weather is definitely different than those two days… a perfect contrast to the harsh blizzard and the sad rain. The snow seems to be falling peacefully… as if rejoicing the return of a loved one…"

"Tezuka," Oishi started worriedly, "are you okay? It's not snowing."

Tezuka blinked at Oishi and turned back to the window. Sure enough, there were no white snowflakes floating toward the ground.

"…I must be thinking too hard," Tezuka murmured and put on a jacket. "I'll be back before dinner," he informed as he left the small apartment, leaving his befuddled roommate to blink in utter confusion.

The cold outside greeted him bitterly, biting at his skin as if it hated him. Tezuka shivered and walked the short distance to the private graveyard only used for his family members.

Tezuka noticed belatedly that someone else was standing in front of Ryoma's grave… someone he didn't think he'd ever seen before. "Excuse me," Tezuka called after clearing his throat. The person with the white wool cap turned his face to the brunette, but Tezuka couldn't see the man's eyes. "Do you know Ryoma?"

"…As a matter of fact, I do," the man replied with a light smile and turned back to the marble grave. "What's your connection to him?" the man asked Tezuka.

"Ah… well, I was his… he was _my_ adopted brother. But… someone killed him…" Tezuka's pale hands clenched into fists and his hazel eyes darkened with anger. "Fuji deserved to die, though."

"…No one _deserves_ to die. People choose to die," the man said softly. "But… you never found Ryoma's body, have you?"

Tezuka looked at the unknown man quizzically. "No, why?"

The man smirked. "You don't know if he's dead then, don't you?"

"…But… the letter…"

"Nothing holds the truth anymore," the man said with a slight smile.

"…He never came home. I haven't seen him for five years."

The man sighed and turned to Tezuka, the latter noticing the man was wearing a doctor's coat. "Okay, I believe you're Tezuka Kunimitsu, right?"

The brunette nodded hesitantly before adding in, "Who wants to know?"

"Dr. Kiryu Shinju at your service. I would like to inform you that we found your younger brother's body… and he is, in fact, alive."

Tezuka's hazel eyes widened and the corners of his mouth curled upward in a smile. "Ryoma… is alive…?"

"Yes… however… he… is in a coma."

Tezuka grabbed onto Shinju's arm. "…Let me see him… please."

Shinju raised an eyebrow and smirked. "Sure, sure. I was going to bring you to him anyway."

_**At the hospital**_

Tezuka sat on the steel chair and covered his left hand over Ryoma's left hand. "…Ryo… wake up," he whispered softly and leaned over the pale body. The slow and steady beeping of the machine filled in the gap of silence. "Please, Ryoma… wake up," tears dripped onto the hospital bed and Tezuka gripped the cold hand in his own large ones. "I… I need you Ryoma… beside me… please…"

Tezuka shook his head and looked at Ryoma's calm face. "…Ryoma…" Tezuka's left hand reached up to caress the smooth skin of his younger brother. "Ryoma… come back…" his voice cracked. "…Come back, Ryoma… please," Tezuka pressed his warm forehead against Ryoma's cold one before closing his hazel eyes.

"I need you, Ryoma."

"…He won't be coming back for a while, Tezuka."

"…How do you get someone out of a coma?"

"There's no definite way. Usually, the person's willpower will get them through. However… I've been studying Ryoma for a long time and… his brain activity has been… lessening," Tezuka's hazel eyes widened and stared at the monitor showing Ryoma's heart rate as well as brain activity.

"It's been very low recently. I suggest staying by his side… for perhaps his last moments. Don't worry, though," Shinju smiled at Tezuka. "I'll do my best to try to 'revive' your dear brother."

The bespectacled brunette nodded and stood, looking back at Ryoma's sweet face. Tezuka smiled faintly and leaned down to kiss Ryoma's cheek. "…Happy birthday, Ryo," he whispered and left a small red box on Ryoma's hand, "and Merry Christmas."

Tezuka left the room and the lights shut off.

_**Days later**_

Shinju tapped his pencil lightly against the stack of paper and scribbled something down.

A gentle smile broke out on his face. "What's up, Shinju?" someone asked from the bathroom.

Shinju chuckled and leaned back as he heard the sound of running water. "Nothing, nothing much anyway. I was just wondering… how easy it is to fall in love with someone who's always around you."

A white haired man walked into the room from the bathroom with a confused eyebrow raised. "What do you mean?"

"Mmn, never mind. Go and take your bath, Shiro… or I might have to get in with you," the whitenette scowled but placed a chaste kiss on Shinju's forehead before leaving.

"…And this…" Shinju eyes the stack of paper with amusement flickering on his face with each paper that passed by his sight. His lips quirked upward. "…Ever since Tezuka visited him a week ago, Ryoma's brain activity has been regaining its usual speed."

_**At the hospital**_

In the dark confines of the hospital room, the monitor beeped to life. Golden eyes stared up at the dark ceiling above before closing, a content smile on the young man's face. "…Thanks, Kunimitsu," the young man held the red box close to his heart, the silver ring inside shining in the little moonlight that was let into the room, "for everything."


End file.
